Good St. Nicholas unleashed Hell’s

Blameless charges, suitably primed

Toward blackened nights, wearing slit

Balaclava – ears to ground

Relentless opportunity

Seeks absentminded victims

Elaborately dressed Santas

– greased pockets coldly sedated –

Well prepared: seasoned and based, trussed

Benefactors with excuses

Graciously doling out consolation

Prizes – temptation’s raw bait – to

Soothe Theresa May’s hapless, JAMs’

Swollen queues invading food banks


Church bells ring out – choirs sing loud

Glory, glory AllahluJAHs

Fully immersed seasonal guilds

Retain remote neon halos

Pinned to dark, new year horizons

Brilliantly obfuscated

Pseudo geometric shapes cloud

Pagan resources, subtly

Cursed with a mythic christ’s brazen

Personality – hoist aloft

Devilishly assumed serpent

Form, trickling minted coins from its

Pierced side, filling; decorated

Buckets under fat, bulging mistletoe


Collective monthly subscriptions

Pour hard cash; well-heeled credit card

Accounts thrive on annual sweat

After gluttonous appetites

Designed to line January’s

Scrooge-like moneylender’s pockets

Reveal periodical wealth

Hammered into goaded ripostes

Suddenly Christmas became more

Immediate, crucifixes

Brought electrified, subconscious

Affiliations triggered by

Ridiculous TV adverts

Honed to eccentric childhood tastes.